ass for cash
Tuesday, September 1st, 2009so, I have this insanely high hospital bill, because as some of ya’all might know, America hates giving affordable insurance to people like me. The Brooklyn Hospital can suck if they even think I’m paying that whole thing, but I do have to pay most of it so I thought hey, might as well get some fun out of all this. So please join me on Sep. 18th for a night of fart party art on display, medical horror story readings and free cookies. The event is free but if you’re so inclined, all the artwork on display will be for sale.
wanna help but can’t attend? you can always buy something from the store
don’t want goofy comics drawings muckin’ up your walls donations are appreciated as well, click the donation box on the top right corner
I’m also accepting comics panel/art work commissions (no paintings at the moment though) inquires can be sent to juliawertz(at)gmail(dot)com
If the details of the party are too small to read on your screen, go here
and of course, the facebook invite.
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September 1st, 2009 at 8:26 am
…The front of your gown is missing. What sort of perverted hospital puts an opening on both sides? A Teaching Hospital?
September 1st, 2009 at 8:35 am
haha gross I hadn’t noticed that. imma fix it
September 1st, 2009 at 8:44 am
Jesus Christ, you got a 3.2 million dollar hospital bill? Or did you mean 3.2K vs 3,200K?
September 1st, 2009 at 8:56 am
arg i can’t do anything right. fixed that too.
September 1st, 2009 at 9:02 am
This is what Republicans refer to as a free-market solution.
Also, cute socks.
September 1st, 2009 at 9:05 am
Great, also, you misspelled the word “Moustache” on the fourth flying banner down. I don’t really know how to spell it, but you might want to just remove it.
The goat kinda stands out, too.
In fact, you might want to remove all the stuff we point out so nobody knows what we’re talking about!
September 1st, 2009 at 10:22 am
Fuck American hospitals. Pay what you can afford when you can afford it, even if it’s just 1.00 a month.
My mother-in-law has a 30k medical bill. She pays 5.00 every 3 months and all they do is send her a new bill. When the collections dept calls. “I have no money. That’s why you get what you get.”
September 1st, 2009 at 11:05 am
Longtime reader, first time poster (hah)
I know you’ve had your stint of medical bills in the past, but if you’re concerned about the amount of this bill, try calling their customer service department and give them the whole “in this economy…” speil. Hospitals are generally more than happy to work on the amount owed and payment plans because if you simply don’t pay (which happens to hospitals a LOT), they (obviously) make a lot less money.
Hope this helps!
September 1st, 2009 at 11:07 am
It might be worth making a few trips to their accounting department. When I was broke, I managed to get most of a $1000 bill knocked down because they got sick of me coming in to the office and saying I needed more time to pay. Hell, they only bill insurance companies part of the claimed fees, why shouldn’t you get the same break? All it takes is finding one Johnson in the department who’s willing to do right..
Good luck
September 1st, 2009 at 11:52 am
You guys shouldn’t believe the religious rights that are crying “Obama’s health system means euthanising old people!!11oneeleven”.
Greetings from German, where the gouvernment tries to change things to the US-way. >,>
September 1st, 2009 at 12:07 pm
i dont think anyone who reads this site thinks that, that’s a few more states in
September 1st, 2009 at 12:11 pm
wow, we gots some critical people up ins today. good luck with your fundraiser, julia. if i wasn’t some 3000 miles away, i’d attend. i have a few hospital bills racked up myself. my best defense has been to just not pay at all. it’s hell on your credit score but a case of beer later, you stop caring about that too
September 1st, 2009 at 1:03 pm
‘Fuck America” is inviting the wrath of the tiny brain folk majority. I advise against it.
an “America Fucks U” party, however, people can relate, and it invites a comparitive curiosity of which method America hath fucked you.
September 1st, 2009 at 1:15 pm
Yeah, I tend to agree with Gary, but then I also think that there’s no such thing as bad publicity. What’s the worst that can happen? Some screwball like Glenn Beck might go on some unfollowable tirade about health care and inadvertantly advertise for you? Besides that, it’s always fun to toy with the crazy right wingers who actually believe in supply side economics.
September 1st, 2009 at 1:30 pm
it’s just a party, it’ll come and then go and no one really cares. Man, why is everyone so nitpicky today?
September 1st, 2009 at 1:45 pm
uhg, I hate hospital/DR.bills and insurance companies. I recently found out I got dropped by my health insurance. I don’t understand it. I still end up owing the Dr’s even when I pay in full or so they say in sending me a bill everytime I see a DR. So I always have to go back and ask them “wtf is this? I already paid in full here’s the gd reciept!” every frickin time too.
September 1st, 2009 at 2:08 pm
I can’t go. Wasn’t nitpicking earlier, just wondering where I could get me one of those perverted hospital gowns. I wouldn’t call it a fuck-up since it was entertaining, so I want to let you know you didn’t have to change it because it was noticeable.
Wait, is that the dress code for the party? That would be great! I still can’t go, so take plenty of pictures for the rest of us!
September 1st, 2009 at 8:41 pm
Dude, you really need to move to MA. We have universal health care for people like you.
September 1st, 2009 at 9:40 pm
Another mistake: Enemas go in the butt, not the arm *duck*
September 1st, 2009 at 11:19 pm
Come for the free booze, stay for the medical horror stories.
I gotta admire your ability to wring laffs out of what must be a dismal and disheartening situation.
September 1st, 2009 at 11:47 pm
Try getting a real job so you can have health insurance. Whine somewhere else.
September 2nd, 2009 at 7:02 am
okay, mr hamel, I’ll quit the “fake” job I have now and traipse on back to college, rack up my debt into dem double digits and get mahself a fancy degree in somethin’ businessey like computer skills. Then I’ll go get myself a “real” job, since they’re so a-plenty right now, and then I’ll get that grown up health insurance I keep hearin’ about that pays for every single hospital bill you might ever get in the whole wide world. I mean, that’s how it works, right? I seen it on TV
September 2nd, 2009 at 7:05 am
Please reinstate the goat. American health care is criminally goat-deficient. PS — I wouldn’t mind a pina colada IV myself, thanks!
September 2nd, 2009 at 8:00 am
There’s a lot of unsolicited advice being bandied about in these comments. I didn’t want to be a part of it, but I was curious if you were aware of Family Health Plus?
It’s essentially Medicaid for low income people under 65, here in NY. I’m 25, a freelancer who can’t afford to pay for insurance. And I’m single, the “Family” part is a bit of a misnomer.
The income requirements are extremely low, but the people who try to recruit you are independent contractors, so they don’t mind it if you bring some suspicious looking letter as proof of income, as long as you have it.
http://www.health.state.ny.us/nysdoh/fhplus/how_much_does_it_cost.htm
And the prescriptions are free.
ps–
I love your comic. I bought I Saw You at the SD comic con and it’s amazing!
September 2nd, 2009 at 8:10 am
Awww, totally bummed about not being eligible for free snax and booze thanks to a serious accident of longitude and latitude (try most of the USA, and the Pacific Ocean (Australia)).
Y’know what? I’m gonna have my *own* party with booze and snacks and all my closest friends (probably just me) just to spite you… and probably buy a print or something so I’ll have my *own* Fart Party artwork…
Yeah… that’s what I’ll do.
Good luck rasin’ those funds.
September 2nd, 2009 at 8:40 am
Jane- yeah, I’m aware of that program. I’m well versed in searching for health care but I’m someone with a “pre existing condition” which means I’m excluded from most local programs and/or the programs are more expensive than if I were a “healthy” person. That specific NY program won’t cover me for the first year after applying because of my condition. It’s totally fucked.
September 2nd, 2009 at 11:02 am
tao lin linked your blog. he made fuck america stickers a while ago.
September 2nd, 2009 at 11:07 am
I have a ‘real’ job that offers great health care benefits and affords me nice things. But it rarely provokes the kind of satisfaction associated with a ‘fake’ job that is one’s true calling, be it art or science. Much as I appreciate art, I’m not gifted or determined enough to be an artist. I envy those who are. I wish my health care would cover a medicine that cures my envy. Get well, Julia.
September 2nd, 2009 at 11:25 am
Good point, pipsqueak! And although I feel really fulfilled by my job, my life would be way impoverished if I were not able to enjoy the work done by people not supported in traditional ways by our society. Rock on, Julia! *donates*
September 2nd, 2009 at 2:11 pm
I love how people think there are only two possible options - business:art::miserable:happy. Is Fart Party syndicated in campus newpapers now or something?
September 2nd, 2009 at 2:16 pm
[...] because garters absolutely do not go with the hopelessly unstylish garment known as the hospital gown. To raise money to defray her medical bills, Wertz is having a bash in Brooklyn that promises [...]
September 2nd, 2009 at 2:18 pm
Seeing as how I’m unemployed and broke, I am forced to continue to enjoy your comic for free.
However, there are many ways to glean money out of your viewers. Have you considered advertising? Put some banners for American Apparel and Brooklyn Vegan, which I assume are appropriate to your audience (heh). Put the archives into a pay section. Hell even google text ads might bring in a steady trickle. Print T-shirts similar to the art you sell.
http://hijinksensue.com/experiment/
September 2nd, 2009 at 2:19 pm
Just random suggestions, I am not telling you how to do your job by any means. Also, is your favicon supposed to be a black square or is something off in my browser/cache?
September 2nd, 2009 at 2:28 pm
mason, no, fart party isn’t syndicated anywhere. I eek out a living doing freelance stuff and working on my next two books. I had google ads once but they were pulled off by google and I won’t even consider polluting this site with american apparel or brooklyn vegan ads. My favicon is a black square because who the fuck cares about favicons? it sounds like a snack from the future
September 2nd, 2009 at 4:01 pm
Dude, move to Canada. Just to warn you, our free healthcare is offset by ridiculously cold winters, which are further offset by our lax narcotics laws.
I guess that qualifies as a net benefit…
Go Canada!
September 2nd, 2009 at 4:03 pm
Tao Lin is the first person to ever say fuck america.
September 2nd, 2009 at 4:16 pm
I thought that said free booze and sex…
I was wrong.
But umm.. isn’t the “free” part of booze and snax going to make your money problem worse?
September 2nd, 2009 at 7:56 pm
Dear Mark, I once had a real job. I earned it after 4 years of college and after temping at a company for two years with 80 hour work weeks without the benefit of health insurance. Then I got great health insurance, went to the doctor, and was diagnosed with a chronic condition. Then the company went bankrupt. Now I don’t even have access to COBRA and I’m competing with all my former co-workers for the same small handful of jobs. In short, after all that ‘real’ work I am in the same boat as Julia, and you are an idiot.
September 2nd, 2009 at 9:55 pm
i object to the critics
unless they portray themselves in hospital garb.
i also object to the deleted items.
most of all the goat…
who is gone…
sad.
and anyone who has nasty things to say to julia
in the usa
should get sick until
they are dropped by their insurance friends
and bugger off
in their own little dream land.
really
wake
up.
you’re less than a paycheck away from the ER yourselves.
enjoy!
September 2nd, 2009 at 10:51 pm
All this discussion about Health Care reform is nice, but seriously it’s just a good excuse to have a party and celebrate the insanity that is FART PARTY!! I’m hoping to show up for a while. What should I bring, besides money?
September 2nd, 2009 at 11:12 pm
I’m still paying for my cancer, but I’ll save up and buy a book from you!
September 3rd, 2009 at 3:49 am
yo, picked up a copy of volume two because i’m shitty and didn’t realize it was out (yes, i just admitted to being waaaaaaay behind on my fart party reading). just spent the night catching up, and i’ll do what i can to help get the word out.
September 3rd, 2009 at 11:25 am
Holy shit! Even reading your comments fills me with rage! I stopped reading the comments on my comic ages ago, cuz like, where do these wieners come from? I’m obviously not talking about everyone here but I mean come on, a “REAL” job? What the fuck even is that??
Not to mention, this is a fucking web comic about YOUR life, why come here if you don’t want to read it? It’s like someone made asshole robots and sent them out onto the internet.
I have an office job at a game company and a mouth full of cavities I can’t get taken care of cuz I don’t have a dental plan. I think I have a right to free health care since you know, it’s kind of a necessity to be able to um, be alive?
Julia! I’m sorry about your shit you are going through!
September 3rd, 2009 at 12:52 pm
Lame. I think someone said this earlier, but call the hospital and see if there’s a way to back out. I’ve gone to the ER a few times and each time I call around and look for someone to waive the fees. There’s always a way to get out of paying.
September 3rd, 2009 at 1:13 pm
I hate the “pre-existing” condition excuse.. It makes me want to say “Then Bill my pre-existing insurance company, mother fucker!”
September 3rd, 2009 at 1:16 pm
it makes me what to tell them to bill God
September 3rd, 2009 at 1:18 pm
really… I empathize for you and so many other Americans who have to put up with the state of your healthcare. I work almost 90% in the U.S. as a systems consultant, so I spend enough time in the U.S. to see the effects.
I am grateful to be Canadian for a number of reasons, but on this particular issue I am also relieved. Our system ain’t perfect by a long shot. But it means I’ll never have to worry about me, my loved ones, or truly *any* Canadian not having access to medical treatment.
Hope you find a way out.
September 3rd, 2009 at 3:54 pm
I only just now figured out that “Buzzer #2″ was not the name of some sort of drink, game, or band or something. Even if I could attend, I’d just end up standing in the lobby and drooling.
September 3rd, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Geez, reading comments can be annoying. Props to you Julia for publishing all the garbagey ones. At first I was wondering why you don’t just delete the negative ones, but I think it’s better that we all see the crap that you would otherwise have to wade through alone.
There was a dude at Yahoo (where I used to work) that would sometimes call comments “community droppings” because people just swoop in and take a (figurative) dump and leave, not really contributing to any higher conversation — so spot-on. Although I really like Jess Fink’s image of a fleet of asshole robots trolling the internet.
Anyway, sorry about your bill. *donates*
September 3rd, 2009 at 5:24 pm
I’m a Medicaid worker, and I am always giving denial letters to people who don’t qualify for Medicaid. So they take my letter to the hospital and then get a massive discount from the hospital they went to.
I hope somehow this might help you out.
September 3rd, 2009 at 9:50 pm
hey Sally, yeah, that’s a perfect description of comments. I allow all of them to go through because otherwise I’ll just respond to one and look like a raving lunatic who blows everything out of proportion. So I’m just spreading the frustration around so all ya’all might understand why checking my comments in the morning sometimes makes me want to chew my own face off.
September 3rd, 2009 at 10:27 pm
i apologize if my comments have contributed to your desire to eat your own face
September 3rd, 2009 at 10:31 pm
About about BOX FOR BUXXX!!
September 4th, 2009 at 9:29 am
I can sympathize as well Julia my * pre existing condition* has made me uneligible for the health insurance given by my husbands * real job*. My pre existing is pregnancy. Come to find out thats a pretty serious condition.Because of my husbands *real job* we don’t qualify for state insurance either.
So ignore all the morons who are actually quite fortunate to live inside their safety bubbles of delusion, content in their belief that it is only the lazy , drug addicted , drunk or insane that do not have health insurance , that are homeless or in poverty.
Ignore them and keep in mind that in this day of ” castles built upon the sand” there is a very good chance that their bubble is going to be popped and they will find themselves in a position they never thought they would be in.
September 4th, 2009 at 10:49 am
I got nothing to say about anything other than your situation really bites. :\ I was uninsured for ages, and completely terrified I’d come down with something, or break a leg.
I’d come to your party if I lived in Brooklyn and not Chicago. And your studio is hella cute - I’d never want to leave it, either. My studio is still boxes and crap on the floor, because I just moved in. (Not like you care, b/c hello, first time commenter, but I’m feeling rambly today.)
September 4th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Have you considered using project wonderful ads? They are less shitty than most ads (i.e. American Apparel and what have you) and you can approve all of them before they go up if you want. Most of the webcomics I read have them. Anyway, just an idea, I dig your site and I want to see you succeed. I came here via Comics Curmudgeon (thank you Josh), and since I live extremely close to where you are at, I probably will be showing up at your party!
September 4th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
Favicons sound like they would taste like cheddar nachos. Delicious.
September 4th, 2009 at 11:02 pm
It’s cool that you don’t want to fill this site with ads, but we’d understand if you changed your mind. We all (or at least most of your readers…hopefully) get that you’re not getting rich off this. We all have experience dealing with with our shitty health care system. I for one wouldn’t go to your site any less frequently or think of you as a sellout if you start filling the site with some ads. Fuck anyone who doesn’t get it. Do anything you can to help yourself Wertz.
September 5th, 2009 at 7:26 am
i’m not opposed to ads, I just CAN’T have them because a) google ads won’t let me and b) as for other ones, I’m woefully ignorant about how to work websites and I can barely maintain the simplicity of this one. Believe me, I’ve tried
September 5th, 2009 at 10:04 am
[...] a chronic condition, no health insurance, and a giant bill from a recent emergency room trip. So she’s having a fundraiser. Also, health care reform is insane and socialist, and our current system is completely awesome and [...]
September 7th, 2009 at 2:05 am
Oh. Well…hitman?
September 7th, 2009 at 10:53 am
Flannery O’Connor had lupus, too. Rockin’!
A friend recently turned me on to Fart Party when he lent me the collections. They made me laugh out loud on the train going to work. If you saw some of the things I have to do there, you would know that this is saying a lot.
I didn’t pay for your stuff and I’m working on the night of your benefit. Also NY Craft Beer Week is starting soon, so…
*beer moneys you*
September 8th, 2009 at 12:31 pm
Hey Julia. Love your stuff and wanted to contribute to your bills so I just purchased FP#2 and Missed Connections via Amazon (I had a gift card, I hope you still get good profits from them?). You’ll be pleased to know that my local library has at least one copy of Missed Connections in it’s shelves. Public circulation! Go you.
September 12th, 2009 at 7:08 pm
haha! booty and witty!
September 12th, 2009 at 7:28 pm
Hey Julia,
Right there with you on the assiness of the healthcare/insurance complex. Not that it makes a whole lot of money, but the project wonderful ads are are, I swear, not that hard to set up, if you’re so inclined. I’ll buy something from your store soon– god knows this site has given me enough entertainment in recent months!
Don’t listen to all that crap about “real jobs” — people have no clue what they’re talking about. Real does not equal good or high paying or anything. So, yeah.
September 13th, 2009 at 12:09 am
Well that was all rather entertaining . . .
Sucks ’bout the bills. I’ve had a cracked tooth for two years because of no insurance. Even tried to go to one of those dental school clinics and it was still too expensive.
September 14th, 2009 at 9:27 am
[...] Brooklyn, NY, 8 PM - Julia Wertz art show [...]
September 14th, 2009 at 9:50 am
[...] September 18 (New York City, NY): Julia Wertz holds a fundraiser reading and art show somewhere at 282 Broadway, beginning at 8PM. Details here. [...]
September 16th, 2009 at 10:48 am
[...] September 18 (New York City, NY): Julia Wertz holds a fundraiser reading and art show somewhere at 282 Broadway, beginning at 8PM. Details here. [...]
September 17th, 2009 at 9:04 am
[...] more party details on the older post here [...]
September 18th, 2009 at 2:18 pm
Yeah, FUCK the country that you want to take care of you, and that gives you the freedom to demand that it be fucked! And FUCK elementary economics for suggesting that a government health “insurance” program will just waste more money, faster, with worse results (cancer survival rates anyone?)! And most of all, FUCK all the Americans who are chipping in to help you, and all the other Americans who buy their products in exchange for money that they can then chip in! FUCK them!
September 18th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
whoa dude, chill the fuck out. next time you want to try your hand at sarcasm, you might wanna put a little more effort into making sure your words are structured so they make sense
November 10th, 2009 at 1:03 am
I would be dubious about the term “America” …. not everyone is the same. So maybe figure out how exactly you are getting f.d and by whom…
November 17th, 2009 at 5:21 am
native americans, ppl in jail, and the millitary all get free insurance(dont forget those senaters who get the best medical care for them self’s an their familys that we the tax payer pay for.