uncomfortable eavesdropping
Sunday, August 9th, 2009I want to be this person and have this job and run this blog: Scouting NY
There’s a party for Indie Spinner Rack and Fart Party this Saturday at Rocketship in Carroll Gardens. I’m thinking of baking cookies for it, but then again I’m always thinking about baking cookies. At the very least there will be free booze. So come! drink! stand awkwardly outside and pretend you smoke! lord knows thats what I do at these things
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August 9th, 2009 at 9:16 am
Ouch…
August 9th, 2009 at 9:44 am
The only thing worse than being talk about is NOT being talked about.
August 9th, 2009 at 9:53 am
Jerks.
They must not notice the occasions where you post pictures or videos of yourself. They’d know you’re not ugly.
August 9th, 2009 at 9:58 am
It will be hilarious/hopefully at least a little embarrassing for them when they read this.
August 9th, 2009 at 10:03 am
I was just going to say I would have said something, but I think Paul’s version will be so much sweeter.
August 9th, 2009 at 10:09 am
Whoa…that must have been weird, but I bet it’ll happen more often as more people read your work…
Next time maybe chime in with retarded semi-facts about yourself like “I heard she is actually an old Puerto Rican man who lives in Hoboken,” or something.
August 9th, 2009 at 10:11 am
She could be anyone. She could be right next to you. She could be asian.
She is…
Dark Girl!
August 9th, 2009 at 11:09 am
Hahaha! Good.
August 9th, 2009 at 11:45 am
Hahahahaha. Best comic yet.
August 9th, 2009 at 11:50 am
fuck em. I’d do ya.
August 9th, 2009 at 11:56 am
totally unrelated to this particular comic:
i wanted to thank you for mentioned andrew jackson jihad in an earlier comic. it got me to buy an album and i am very glad i did. though this was just two days ago, so i suppose i might get tired of it, especially if i keep listening to it nearly non-stop.
August 9th, 2009 at 12:08 pm
Holy, shit, that’s terrible.
I don’t know whether to laugh…..or not laugh?
At least you know you’re famous enough to be talked about in real life.
August 9th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
eh, Schultz did the same thing for decades after we all “got it already.” Last thing I enjoy is some sort of culminating point to it all. What are they waiting for, “Our Cancer Year?” Blegh.
I say, keep on with the ass bunnies! Dance, cartoonist, dance!
August 9th, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Once I met someone who had read my posts on a local message board but somehow hadn’t realized that real life me was the one who had made them. After chatting for a while he suddenly made the connection and, in a moment of complete astonishment, exclaimed, “/You’re/ jwgh? I thought you’d be smaller and more annoying!”
August 9th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
What stopped you from introducing yourself???? A thin skin?
Love you anyway…Mom
August 9th, 2009 at 3:02 pm
this is to Brian: yeah, Andrew Jackson Jihad!
August 9th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
I’ve been listening to this excellent podcast lately, don’t know if you listen to comedy podcasts much, but seems like you’d like it…they do this thing called Overheards where the hosts and their guests talk about funny things they’ve…well, overheard.
Give it a listen, having read Fart Party a while I think their sense of humour would appeal to you. Then you can call or email them with your own Eavesdro…er, Overheards
Hope you enjoy!
http://stoppodcastingyourself.blogspot.com/
August 9th, 2009 at 3:29 pm
If you had jumped in on that conversation pretending to just be another reader, that would have been hilarious.
August 9th, 2009 at 3:31 pm
I don’t think that I would have been able to resist the urge to just turn around and stare at them. In any case, way to do it!
August 9th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
You truly have reached the event horizon of autobiographical comics. Very VERY surreal.
August 9th, 2009 at 4:40 pm
After all, Wertz is a very common Asian surname. By the way, ARE you ugly in real life?
August 9th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
no, I’m the hottest motherfucker alive. That’s why I’m in to amazing shit like fashion and jimmy cho shoes and cummerbunds or whatever it is super sexy people are into these days.
August 9th, 2009 at 5:38 pm
you kinda draw all the men alike…
August 9th, 2009 at 5:49 pm
yeaaah, I know. I’m gonna keep phoning it in like that until I find one that interests me enough to not use a prototype.
August 9th, 2009 at 6:11 pm
We all know how ALL asians look the same ;D.
And like John said, we know you’re not ugly.
August 9th, 2009 at 7:54 pm
Heh Heh! …that’s pretty odd, weird & funny! Makes me wonder if yoy told them you were her. In real life you’re a cute lil cartoonist, ms Julia Wertz!
August 9th, 2009 at 8:39 pm
Julia, I live you!
August 9th, 2009 at 8:54 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
August 9th, 2009 at 8:54 pm
<_< typing fail…
Julia, I LOVE you!
August 9th, 2009 at 8:54 pm
Now they will read this . . HHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
August 9th, 2009 at 9:08 pm
nnnnng i hate the internet/right now.
August 9th, 2009 at 9:32 pm
is she asian? REALLY??? wow.
August 9th, 2009 at 10:23 pm
…fuck man!
Your last few comics make me wish that I knew you in real life.
But then I look in the mirror and realize I have no legs.
August 9th, 2009 at 11:01 pm
I think you should have flipped your table and then punched out a window. Then turn your chin up to the sky and screeched with all your might.
August 9th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
I live you - best typo ever
August 10th, 2009 at 5:56 am
Aaand… hernia.
August 10th, 2009 at 8:05 am
Man, just wait until they see THIS comic…
August 10th, 2009 at 8:12 am
My favorite part is that they obviously think you might be asian because you draw yourself with straight black hair.
August 10th, 2009 at 8:16 am
Oh, no, darling, cummerbunds are SO 2008. Spats are where it’s at.
Swear to GOD, when I hit 60, I’m wearing a three-piece suit with spats and a walking stick every day for the rest of my life. Headgear will range from the standard fedora in cold weather to the straw boater in summer. Top hat and cape to the opera, natch.
August 10th, 2009 at 8:21 am
well you should keep on bitching about. if thats who you are, thats who you are.
August 10th, 2009 at 8:30 am
I kind of agree that the whole “I’m broke, buy my shit” gets old, but it’s kind of a catch 22, because you really are.. and that’s about all you can do to get money.
At least it’s not as bad as this other comic I’m reading. They’ve literally spent about 13 comics… in a row… about this one guy thinking his buddy at school knows he’s a werewolf, when in all actuality his buddy is gay and has a crush on him, and he’s asking his teacher who knows both sides and won’t say anything about him being gay or the fact that he knows his buddy *doesn’t* know he’s a werewolf.
13 comics in a row is a LONG fucking time in web comic time.
August 10th, 2009 at 9:10 am
Monocles.
We super-sexy people are totally into monocles.
Get with the times!
August 10th, 2009 at 9:29 am
I like the table flipping suggestion above. But that’s not really you - or at least the impression of you I have from reading about you. How much those two yous align in reality is anyone’s guess. For all I know, you dumped your drink in their laps, and then pooped on their table. Heh. Poop.
August 10th, 2009 at 9:51 am
Yeah, it’s a tough one… one the one hand, you can’t create good art while bowing to pressures of everyone who critiques it, on the other hand, insulated yourself from all criticism can lead to stale, crappy stuff…
August 10th, 2009 at 11:46 am
you realize this doesn’t happen to just everyone, right?
August 10th, 2009 at 1:51 pm
wait, you AREN’T asian? but you’re so short and you always talk about ordering chinese food.
August 10th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
Horrible! I bet you’re gorgeous in real life! F’em!
August 10th, 2009 at 3:09 pm
ouch.
I got something like that when I left my old band. A friend was listening to a song with the new singer and had mentioned “did PE get signing lessons? this is much better”
pe
August 10th, 2009 at 4:48 pm
I think you’re consistently hilarious and a total fox to boot. I get excited about people talking about Fart Party even if it’s partially negative because I think the word needs to be spread and I love that it’s gaining popularity. When one of my friends doesn’t like it, I feel like they are less of a friend. It’s the same with Arrested Development. If you don’t like Arrested Development and Fart Party, you aren’t rad anymore.
August 10th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
Ha! HA!
Maybe it’s just the pictures you post of yourself online.. At comic con I remember thinking that you are way more attractive in person than your photos.
I was worried that I came off nervous btw… Right as I shook your hand, I had the curse of the soupie poopies hit me.
(thank you convention food!)
I remembered spouting a bunch of random stories in an attempt to cover… then skeedaddled to the bathroom.. the gross convention bathrooms. I used so many seat covers on the toilet, it looked like a wedding cake.
As I was relieving myself, I looked over to the only graphitti on the stall.. “If you want to be jerked off, be in this stall at 1pm, 3pm and 5pm” I looked at my cell phone it was 12:46am.
I did the fastest clean-up ever, even with the TP roll dispensing 1 sheet at a time..
I feel sorry for whoever went there for sexual liaison.
I had 12 minutes before 1 by the time I was done.. and part of me wanted to wait to see what kinda people would offer such things.. or who’d take up that offer… maybe someone in a Senator Craig costume??
but after a minute of waiting I stopped caring.
August 10th, 2009 at 6:26 pm
i seem to have that effect on people, the inducing of uncontrollable shitting. I wish you’d hung out in the bathroom longer though, I’m really curious as to what kind of gross nerd gives handjobs in the comic con bathroom
August 10th, 2009 at 7:03 pm
I’m kicking myself too.. the night before at the Hyatt Bar, I met a girl who said her job was being a “companion.”
I asked “So, if I were going to Mordor, you’d come with?”
She said “No, a companion is a nice word for ‘escort”
I said “I thought escort was the nice word.”
she laughed.. and I said “Look at my hairy wrist.. time to go”
It would have been the greatest comic-con story ever if she was the one who showed up. but, more likely it was a gay dude dressed up as Mr. Spock.. who was about to administer the Vulcan penis pinch.
http://www.jimis-cyberstore.com/store/images/mens/cbs_260_pon_farr_spock_tee_.jpg
August 10th, 2009 at 7:07 pm
And, I think you’d only have that effect on people if you served 8 hour pretzel dogs with coagulated mustard.
August 10th, 2009 at 7:09 pm
Did you get con depression?
Where for 4 days people come up to you saying Wow! Julia Wertz!! Do you know who you are?? Sign my shit!! ..and then you go back to your normal life where nobody gives a crap?
August 10th, 2009 at 10:07 pm
Oh… Once i have money I am going to buy the second fart party. Come on student loans!!!
August 10th, 2009 at 10:36 pm
did you then get up and punch that ass hole and showed him what for?
August 10th, 2009 at 11:05 pm
well, i guess that means you’ve got some fans.
that’s good, no?
how does this make you feel?
i once was on the phone w/ my sister in a busy mall while she was looking for me. we were sure we were in the same area so we were looking around while being on the phone….
well, i farted a really nasty fart as i was walking and she tells me “Oh my god! someone cut a really nasty fart!”.
i turned around and she was about five feet behind me.
that’s the closest i’ve got…..
August 11th, 2009 at 12:06 am
Ahaha… what a mindtrip. If I was in that position I would have finished drawing that comic (well the one that’s featured here) and shown it to them and watch their skulls implode.
And that scouting site is awesome. I love it when I find baby birds tucked away in obscure places, too. I’d do the same in my city but there are probably heaps of other people doing it.
August 11th, 2009 at 12:43 am
HAAA! Really? I bet she’s Asian in real life? I woulda said Jewish. But uuuugly? Never! Okay, maybe half-Asian, half Jewish because you only have one squinky eye.
Incidentally, thyroid issues are oft mis-diagnosed as depression. Just think, if cousin Charlie would have gotten on Levoxyl, we wouldn’t have had Peanuts.
August 11th, 2009 at 8:31 am
@Phrozt-that plotline was used in a Buffy episode
August 11th, 2009 at 12:20 pm
you should have drawn them something then had the waitress take it over to them with their bill after you’d left or something. the cartoonist’s version of sending a drink to the table.
August 11th, 2009 at 12:30 pm
@plektix
Isn’t that episode about being invisible instead of a werewolf?
August 12th, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Maybe if you were wearing an awesome Fart Party T-shirt?
August 14th, 2009 at 8:25 am
@plektix… did it take 15 episodes to get it out in the open?
(and btw… they’re STILL going on about it… I’m betting a resolution to this in roughly 3-5 comics).
August 14th, 2009 at 11:04 am
….it’s a double-edged sword, really. most people have sordid lives they publish, and rarely, if anyone, notices them. i’ve never seen a pic of you so i don’t know if you’re ugly or not, but something tells me no. no, not likely. still….fucking awkward situation, man.
August 14th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
did I miss it? did they write you? I want to read the reaction from those bar flies.
September 3rd, 2009 at 11:02 am
aahhhh ! I wish you said something so bad! Like just walked over and introduced yourself real calmly and then walked away.
AMAZING!
Also, I would like to state to all the non-Julias that Julia is way fucking attractive in real life and doesn’t even have to be asian to do it. Even though when I saw her she was hiding on the floor behind the table at Mocca.
September 3rd, 2009 at 12:13 pm
i couldn’t stop laughing when i read this one…
September 4th, 2009 at 1:06 am
that’s amazing I hope it really happened. I sort of fantasize about stuff like this but only like 3 people read my comics..
It’s fucking weird that you spend your whole life busting your ass hoping someone will care about your drawings, and then when they do it’s even fucking weirder, and people send you crazy emails and all you want to do is hide and hang out with your friends and not have strangers talk to you about stupid crap..
like the Dan Clowes “party” story where the grunge guy starts talking to him about some band..
June 7th, 2010 at 1:38 am
I rarely read the comments as rarely as I did this time. Oh well, they didn’t fess up. Guess they don’t read it anymore?
I was once told that I write as if I had dark hair. What the bleep that means was not elucidated.
June 22nd, 2010 at 11:15 am
carefully. I rarely read the comments as carefully as I did that time. And I usually write more carefully.
…
It’s gonna be weird if you ever illustrate an incident in which your real appearance is relevant.