haters & purists can suck it
Friday, April 4th, 2008ps- thanks to everyone who did come to my defense, I totally appreciate it and I heart you guys, but for this post, it’s not necessary. I can take the hate, it makes doing this more interesting. Some haters even have valid points, but I just have a really hard time even pretending to give a shit. And to the people who emailed me and were all like “oooh you sell out, doing stuff for Vice,” FYI, accusing people of selling out is sooo 1998. Oh yeah, also, to the dude who accused me of being totally self indulgent, do I really need to point out that it’s an AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL comic? of course it’s self indulgent? If I wanted to save baby seals or end world hunger, I wouldn’t try and do it through Fart Party.
and Miles- I totally forgot about that comic and your gastrointestinal issues. I’m gonna post it next week, that shit was hilarious! no pun intended.
April 4th, 2008 at 10:32 am
Haters? Bah. I’m still readin’ and laughin’, and THAT is your real barometer right there: me laugh = ist good.
April 4th, 2008 at 10:37 am
…The hell? What kind of purists would even talk that way. At least offer criticisms that make sense. These comics are more like, say, Steven comics from the golden ages, when they’re used to “weeeeeeebbbbcomics”. Pfft.
Y’argh. Scourge of the internets.
April 4th, 2008 at 10:43 am
I am having a little trouble deciding which issue to tackle. As I have previously attempted (succesfully) to solve the problems outlined in your comics, thus ensuring a better life for all involved, I will do so here.
If you are to find another baggie of white powder, I would suggest either selling it as cocaine (a popular ’street drug’) or having someone bet you $20 that you won’t snort it (remember to snort it). You can then use this money to help fix your poverty problems (as outlined before), or purchase a new Papasan chair/bed (another problem outlined earlier).
That’s called making lemonade, motherfuckers.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:05 am
Pardon my French, but who the fuck is the douchebag who posted the hyperlinks comment? As a computer geek, I think I can smell one of my own. I’m betting that its a guy, in his early or mid 20s, who plays WAY too many video games, and who has never known the pleasure of making a woman come. I fucking HATE people like this.
Hey Poindexter, here’s a tip - if you use the words ‘contextually’ and ‘non-idiomatic’ in your complaint about a free online comic that has at least twice shown its lead character shitting (in color, no less), then there is a very old, very time-honored word to describe you. “Cunt.” You, sir, are a cunt.
I don’t know her personally, but I think its safe to say that Julia doesn’t use bleeding edge, perfectly formatted hypertext for the same reason that I and hundreds of thousands of others don’t. WE’VE GOT OTHER FUCKING THINGS TO DO. If all you can find on the internet to criticize is a web page’s fucking layout, then you are a completely worthless human being. Don’t waste everyone’s time by taking stabs at people who aren’t in the business of giving a shit about html coding. Only fucktards like yourself care about such minutia enough to post about it.
Do us all a favor - don’t ever post a comment like this again, anywhere. Your time would be better spent finding a throttling woodchipper in which to insert your genitalia, in order to ensure that you never pass on your complete lac of social skills to any unfortunate offspring you may conceive. Fuck off, sir. You are hated.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Also, I misspelled ‘lack.’ Because I never learned to proofread.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:10 am
I think these haters needs a good ol’ ass whipping.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:15 am
I say it’s one thing or the other - end world hunger OR save baby seals. sealburgers for all!
Or if you sneeze enough cupcakes, problem solved. Baby seals like cupcakes too, don’t they?
April 4th, 2008 at 11:19 am
hatemail, generally is a good thing, I think. It means that you are stirring up emotions. No response would be much worse.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:23 am
If your comics make everyone happy then you aren’t doing it right.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:25 am
Ha ha “go fuck a rainbow.” I have no idea what the hell that means, but I sitll love it.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:49 am
Heck, everybody should fuck rainbows. It makes you euphoric and leaves your dick all color-swirled like a novelty popsicle. Or in the case of women, it leaves your treasure-box full of gold coins that you can douche out and buy baggies of flour and sugar with.
But by far the best part is fucking the Leperchaun.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
Is your art the best ever? No. Is your comic funny all the time? No. But guess what? It’s honest, and that’s what makes it a great comic, for me at least. Keep it up, ’cause you’re really making something good here. Thanks for your work, it is appreciated.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
I like your comic! It makes me giggle and brightens up my day! Please keep drawing your comic. Don’t listen to those fuckers on the internet. If they really don’t like it, then they don’t have to read it. Unless someone is making them….then they should “fuck a rainbow.” I think I am going to use that now…
April 4th, 2008 at 1:45 pm
These people are douches who wouldn’t know clever, original shit if it came up to them on the street with a ballpean hammer and slammed them over the the top of the head. I swear, some people just criticize because they can, (please, someone did not complain about HYPERLINKS. WHO IS THIS PERSON?!?) and they need to get over their self-important opinions. And speaking of self-important opinions, just know that I think Fart Party is fucking delightful and funny, and I have a posse of people who feel the same (that still includes all of the ladies from the hat store). Keep up the fucking fantastic work. Fer serious.
April 4th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Idiots don’t know good stuff if it hit them on the head
April 4th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
Fuck those Assholes, FART PARTY ROCKS!!!!!!!
April 4th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
>>jfruh: “Ha ha “go fuck a rainbow.†I have no idea what the hell that means, but I sitll love it.”
Probably looks somethin’ like this -> http://www.ahiddenlittledoor.com/images/rainbowlove.png
April 4th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
those ass chomping cock-holsters over at vice weren’t even able to conjure comebacks after the fartist and co. went over there and regulated. at least thats what i like to think happened… and i agree with dave, not perfect but damn addictive for some unknown reason.
Julia “Das Fuhrer” Wertz
April 4th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
I hope this doesn’t turn into something like the Nothing Nice to Say boards, where it turned out that EVERYONE on the board hated Mitch for some reason and he was driven to insanity for a few years, and actually MOVED TO TEXAS!! Who does that, anyways?
April 4th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
plus im still going at it over at the vice. somebody said that an angel dies when people buy your books… thats just downright hilarious.
I am Brett Riss, Destroyer of Angels!
April 4th, 2008 at 3:36 pm
You know. I was feeling kinda down, but I’m gonna go fuck a rainbow and see if that cheers me up..
later haters,
_m
April 4th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
yeah, feel free to stop arguing on the Vice sight. like, NOW. I didn’t mean to start this whole love/hate war and I want to take it all back. It’s boring and pointless. yeahyeah, I get it, some of you hate me some of you love me. Let’s call it quits now before someone gets hurt. or gets an eye shot out.
April 4th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
i’ll call off the hounds. all i said was “every time matt makes a comment, another vapid moron is born.”
cheeky nonsense. but im still the destroyer of angels
April 4th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
The thing about Vice is that hating, whether it’s from the editors or readers is a sport. There’s a culture on that website that is unlike any other. I don’t think I’ve ever seen an article/fashion spread/letter that hasn’t provoked some hating - and usually there’s *much* more vitriol than has greeted your awesome stuff.
But the super rad thing is that Vice brought me and a bunch of other people to you, and you changed our whole lives.
April 4th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
Thats ok, I still love you and checking in with you everyday. Its your post break up evil I sorta like. F -em.
April 4th, 2008 at 6:24 pm
Your comics are most excellent. The first time I came across one, I thought it was so great that I actually went through all of them… in one sitting. That either means that I have too much time on my hands, or you are great at what you do. Anyway — keep up the good work, haters just need a hobby or something.
April 4th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
Actually Hitler’s art was boring. Pretty sometimes, but boring always.
Hate Mail = You have arrived. Congrats. I’m celebrating and sending you money for no particular reason…but it’ll probably be HATE MONEY!
April 4th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
I sometimes get similarly closed-minded people posting comments on my photography. I figure, if they can’t bother to try to be constructive with their negative “I don’t like it, change it or I’ll bitch some more” comments, I won’t bother paying attention to them.
I dig your comics, Julia, so keep doing whatever it is you’re doing (living?).
April 4th, 2008 at 8:01 pm
I got some good news!
I was sitting at the bus terminal waiting for my ride to come and I picked up the local free paper, started flipping through it casusally and lo-and-behold I spot Fart Party, featured in the dotcom section. The guy who wrote about it gave it three w’s outta three.
I assume you know about it, but it was exciting cause its such a small Canadian area,
April 4th, 2008 at 8:07 pm
That is one of the worst ideas I have ever heard of, bravo. Next lets lick the mystery goo off of the hotel wall. Maybe it’s chocolate icing to top your fantastic cupcakes. [tasty]
April 4th, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Hey Julia you rocking any cons in the near future? (and if so will you be anywhere near your signing desk?)
How far north do you ever get for signings and sellings anyway?
I like your book but it’d be cool if you hated on mine!
April 4th, 2008 at 11:11 pm
“Fart Party Ends World Hunger” would be a sweet headline though
April 5th, 2008 at 3:55 am
haha… I’m sorry to say it, but you had to know people would jump to your defense
The people who read your comic are pretty damn loyal.
April 5th, 2008 at 3:58 am
Oh, and like Cat I read all of your comics in one sitting… and it inspired me to try something new with my painting.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:01 am
that reminds me of the time i smoked a bag of weed i found in a tree by that pond at the palace of fine arts. it looked kind of old… and i guess it could have been laced with something… but it was found weed! it did the job.
although it did taste kind of like gasoline… and now i no talk as good… but still every time i go back there i glance at the knot in the tree of life for a wisp of shiny plastic.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:27 am
“If you can’t say something nice, don’t day nothing at all.” also “Reductio ad Hitlerum” (look it up). Also “I’m drunk, what the fuck do I know?”
April 5th, 2008 at 5:35 am
I’m still extremely fascinated with the person who compared Julia to Hitler. Exactly what thought process does a mind go through to make that comparison? What other items does (s)he compare to Hitler? Squirrels? Pancakes? I really want to meet this person…
April 5th, 2008 at 7:22 am
jonny- yeah, there’s a list of cons I’ll be at on the upcoming events/shows page but cons make me cranky and antsy so I only sit at my booth for about half the time. If the con is anywhere near a bar, you’ll have a better chance at finding me there.
April 5th, 2008 at 9:43 am
Something I learned that has saved me a lot of grief is this: Never EVER read the comments. They are invariably written by mouth-breathing assholes with nothing better to do than be dicks on the internet (myself very likely included) no matter how actually cool or smart or funny they may be in real life.
Don’t let the bastards get you down!
April 5th, 2008 at 10:23 am
Actually, Hitler’s main body of work consisted primarily of boring landscape paintings and architectural sketches. You could have hung them up in a dentist’s office, really.
April 5th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
I think your comic are just swell!
April 5th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
I don’t see how anyone could miss the classic brilliance obviously present in your comics. You’re an artist I definitely look up to.
April 5th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
WOW.
You got compared to Hitler? Really? Hitler???
That’s just ridiculous… Didn’t know that whole snippet of history was taken *quite* that lightly these days lol
But really, I’m all for everyone being entitled to their opinion and blah blah blah, but….why e-mail that to you? lol
Just seems like you’re trying to spread around your own misery at that point.
April 5th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Fart Party is the best. Don’t let anyone try and confuse you towards an alternative viewpoint.
April 5th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
Why must there be assholes wherever we go? We can’t go to the comic book store(is there some other term like, “Comics Shop,” that “purists use?) without having some cunt, who doesn’t know you or your sense of humor, suggest something that’s supposedly “Way better” than what you’ve picked out. It always turns out that they suggest something that 4chan losers find funny. If only I had a license to kill.
April 5th, 2008 at 11:54 pm
yawn.
April 6th, 2008 at 12:08 am
joelle- I couldn’t agree more. snoooore.
April 6th, 2008 at 8:16 am
See, without all the hate you would never write this post and I would never have found out about rainbow fucking (which is something I think I should know about, being gay).
Anyway, I don’t care if you’re a shit throwing shitler monkey.
keep up the good work.
April 6th, 2008 at 8:18 am
And btw,
I don’t even remember why selling out was ever considered a BAD thing.
April 6th, 2008 at 6:56 pm
a: I can’t even read a paragraph that has anything to do with how to use hyperlinks, so forget that one. b: Anyone who compares anyone to Hitler is as bad as… as Hitler! (Those should have been in reverse order). c: I have nothing against valuing craft or artistry in comics, that’s very important. But anyone who thinks there are Rules in comics (or in any art)… or even Standards… I think is missing something essential about comics. “Combines handwriting and text?” This is a sin? (I’m actually not even sure what that refers to). This is COMICS… if they are funny, human and alive, they are good. For me. And “Fart Party” is. Are. Those things. As far as I know (added Hillary Clinton).
April 7th, 2008 at 12:08 am
Dude seriously….if they have a problem why they hell do they continue to read. I just found this comic a month or two ago and I’m enjoying it plenty.
Srsly Whateves
April 7th, 2008 at 1:26 am
You are in no way obligated to respond to criticism of your works. In fact it’s probably better for everyone if you don’t. Its a waste of your time, and none of your fans are really interested in listening such an argument. And if the critics come back to read your rebuttals, then they probably weren’t very sincere in their criticism in the first place.
April 7th, 2008 at 10:34 am
The fact that it bothers you enough to actually devote some of your time to it is rather disheartening.
April 8th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
I really love the fart party. I think its more subtle, like the british sense of humour. those idiot vice readers didn’t get it so that’s why they were slagging it off. your comics really are my favourite and i think they’re just as great now as they always were.
keep it foolish!
all the best
angela x